Stole this from Tracy

I've neglected this blog- it's hard working full-time, being a mommy full-time and writing regularly! Anyway, here's a Meme about naming your kiddos! I took it from Tracy's Blog "What's on Mommy's Mind".

1. Do you have any cultural or religious naming traditions?
Nope.
2. Did you or your partner come to the marriage with pre-selected names?
No. I had "favorites" from childhood/teen years, but when we first started dating, then got married, we weren't sure we were going to have kids.
3. Did you consider the sound of the first and middle and last names together? Did this make any sad eliminations?
Oh yes... this was absolutely necessary. Not much sounds good with Monardo. Personally, I think my own name sounds weird with it.
4. Did you have veto powers?
Of course. There will never be a Salvatore Anthony Monardo Jr.... too Staten Island for me.
5. Did the baby naming cause arguments?
No, Sal was pretty good about just agreeing with me :-)
6. Do you think it is easier to name boys or girls?
It's hard both ways for us, again because I think most names sound weird with our last name. We do have a boys name and another girls name picked out though if/when we have another. And the boys name is actually all family names- as long as you don't steal it, I'll share: Jack Thomas Bryce Monardo. I really hope I have a boy because I love the name.
7. Did you eliminate names because of people from your past or present who you don’t like or because a certain image comes to mind?
Yes, but at this very moment I'm drawing a blank on what it was... I just remember being very adament!
8. Did you / would you survey your children to get their thoughts on the name?
No we didn't. And honestly, my M-I-L hated Sophie's name. But tough cookies because mind was made up!
9. Did you tell people the name or possible names before the baby was born or were they “in the vault”?
Yes, but we weren't swayed.
10. Did you use baby name books?
Yes, but they weren't the deciding factors.

Drumroll Please…What did you name your kid(s)?

Sophia Jayne

An Unexpected Visitor

The title of this post will be serving a duel purpose today. There are actually 2 unexpected visitors in my world.

First, I'll tell about the really unwanted visitor- my period. Yes, I'm just over 5 weeks postpartum and I got my period. I swear I jinxed myself because I told the doctor on Tuesday that I was feeling cramps. He told me that cramps can appear a few weeks before my period arrives. Cool. I can deal with cramps, they're not so bad. Then Wednesday the cramps invited their friend dull backache along. Wednesday night, cramps took a break and sent "the headache" in for a round. This morning, cramps, headache and dull backache were all in attendance for the big show! Ugh! At least I can start back up on my BC. Just annoying.

My other visitor is one of the spirit variety. It seems Grandpa Bryce has been hanging around my house the past few days. I smell him. Know how all grandpa's have that distinctive scent? Yeah, he did too. And every time I smell it, Sophie looks up to a particular corner of the living room and smiles. I asked her the other day "Who's up there? Is that Grandpa Bryce?" And she continued to smile. I firmly believe that children are more open to seeing the paranormal- they do not have the knowledge of what they are "supposed to see" or "not supposed to see". Before I was believing it was my Grandpa, I did search around the house to be sure it wasn't something else. I checked all my candles, air fresheners, etc. And it wasn't Sal's cologne- he so very rarely wears any. I think Grandpa was just checking in on us and peeking at the latest addition to the family. I often "talk" to my grandparents and perhaps they sent him down to see what all the fuss is about :-)

Anyone who knows me well, knows about how haunted my parent's house is. And we're all in the belief that the spirits are my deceased grandparents. The sightings didn't start until the passing of my Grandpa Jack. And with each death after they increased. Why they picked my parent's house, I can't say for sure, but my mother has always been "sensitive". So maybe they figure it's they best place to be noticed?!

The Price of Children

My Aunt Pat sent this to me in an email today, I loved it so much I wanted to post it. Every word is so true!!


The Price of Children

I have repeatedly seen the breakdown of the cost of raising a child, but this is the first time I have seen the rewards listed this way.

It's nice.

The government recently calculated the cost of raisinga child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140.00 for a middle income family.

Talk about price shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition.

But $160,140.00 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into:
* $8,896.66 a year,
* $741.38 a month,
* $171.08 a week.
* A mere $24.24 a day!
* Just over a dollar an hour.

Still, you might think the best financial advice is: don't have children if you want to be 'rich.'

Actually, it is just the opposite..

What do you get for your $160,140.00?
* Naming rights. First, middle, and last!
* Glimpses of God every day.
* Giggles under the covers every night.
* More love than your heart can hold.
* Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
* Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
* A hand to hold usually covered with jelly or chocolate.
* A partner for blowing bubbles and flying kites.
* Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how
your stocks performed that day.

For $160,140.00, you never have to grow up. You get to:
* finger-paint,
* carve pumpkins,
* play hide-and-seek,
* catch lightning bugs,
* never stop believing in Santa Claus.

You have an excuse to:
* keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,
* watch Saturday morning cartoons,
* go to Disney movies, and
* wish on stars.

You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodlewreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.

For a mere $24.24 a day, there is no greater bang for your buck.

You get to be a hero just for:
* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,
* taking the training wheels off a bike,
* removing a splinter,
* filling a wading pool,
* coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and
* coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You get a front row seat in history to witness the:
* First step,
* First word,
* First bra,

* First date,
* First time behind the wheel.

You get to be immortal.
You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great- grandchildren.

You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications and human sexuality that no college can match.

In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God.

You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost.

That is quite a deal for the price!!!!!!!

Love & enjoy your children & grandchildren & great-grandchildren!!
It's the best investment you'll ever make!!

Before I Was a Mom

One of the girls posted this on my April 2009 Mommies message board on Babyfit.com; I believe it was an email that was sent to her. I had to share it though, I love it!


Before I was a Mom,
I never tripped over toys
or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not
my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind
and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held down a screaming child
so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night
watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because
I didn't want to put them down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces
when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small
could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of
having my heart outside my body..
I didn't know how special it could feel
to feed a hungry baby..
I didn't know that bond
between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small
could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night
every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment
or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
before I was a Mom.

Birth Story of Sophia Jayne!

On April 20th, I had an appointment with my OB at 9 am.  We were taken in and I was hooked up to the NST.  The previous night was very rough on me, I was getting terrible back pains and my sciatic nerve was absolutely killing me.  So laying on a hard table hooked up to a monitor was not fun for me.  By the time the doctor came in to check on me, I was fighting off tears, I was so uncomfortable!  He asked how we were doing and I just lost it.  I couldn't help but cry.  He asked what was wrong, etc and I explained everything to him.  He gave me some tissues and told me to relax and he'd be right back.  I composed myself and he returned a few moments later.  He asked what I would think about being induced.  I told him I was ready to have the baby, so I was fine with that.  He then checked me and I was 1 cm.  I looked over at Sal and we both were expecting the doctor to plan an induction for later in the week.  Well, Dr. Molina surprised us both when he said "Okay, what I want you two to do today is go have some brunch, walk her around a bit and be at the hospital this afternoon at 4"  I was shocked!  I honestly didn't think he'd schedule it for that afternoon!

So, we left there completely elated!  We went and ate at the new diner by our house (I had pancakes and pork roll!) then walked around the mall for a bit.  We were home by 12:30 or so and finished up loose ends.  Last minute packing, wrote out some bills, made our phone calls, etc.

We got to the hospital by 4 and were settled into our room.  Dr. Lehnes was on duty and he came in and put in the Cervadil at 5:30 and of course I immediately had to go to the bathroom!  Too bad for me, I had to be horizontal for at least 2 hours before I was allowed to get up.  They did offer me a bed pan, but I declined.  I'd rather squirm with the need to pee than attempt a bed pan!  Around 9 the doctor came back in to check my progression and I was 2 cm, so the Cervadil was doing its job!  At 10, the nurse came in to check me and she removed that damn shoe string- it was really bothering me for some reason; very scratchy!  She gave me a sleeping pill to help me get some rest and I dozed off for a bit.  At midnight I woke up with some serious contractions, the nurse checked me and I was 3 cm.  She called the doctor and he said I could have a shot for the pain.  Well, Sophie's heart rate wasn't high enough to give me the shot- we tried for about 2 and a half hours to get it up- rolling me over left and right, etc.  My nurse called the doctor again and he said if I wanted the epidural, that I could have that.  So at 3 am I got my epidural and by 4 am I was fast asleep!  At 7 am the doctor came back in to check me and I was 5 cm, so he broke my water and ordered for the Pitocin to be started at 8 am.  From there, things seemed to move pretty quickly, I was fully dilated by 11:30 according to the nurse, who wanted to confirm that with the doctor.  Dr Molina came in and confirmed that and told the nurse to "teach me" how to push.  So at noon we did "practice pushes"- 3 per contraction.  Well, I only needed the one contraction to confirm I knew how to push- in fact, with my practice push, Sophie was starting to crown.  My contractions were pretty far apart- about every 6-8 minutes, and by 12:38 pm I had Sophie Jayne!!  

Quick sidenote:  the epi worked so well, I didn't feel a THING.  Literally, nothing at all.  It was a little weird pushing without feeling what I was doing, but hell, I did it! 

I ended up having to have an episiotomy because her head didn't fully rotate and came out sideways.  No big, ya gotta do what ya gotta do.  Dr Molina stitched me up and then they turned off the epi.  That's when things went downhill fast.  The withdrawal was horrible for me.  I began to feel EVERYTHING.  The nurses had to keep coming in to push on my belly, etc. to get all that extra gunk out- which I know is their job and is totally necessary, but HOLY HELL did it hurt!  They gave me a motrin and darvocet combo, which kinda eased things.  I thought I could handle that..until the nurse came in to get me up and into the bathroom.  It was time to clean me up and get me padded.  I sat on the edge of the bed and felt dizzy; so she put my arm around her and started to help to to the bathroom.  Then, the tunnel vision started and I thought I was going to pass out.  The nurse grabbed the chair and sat me down and whipped out her smelling salts.  She called for another nurse and they both tried to get me up when I said I felt a bit better.  A few more steps and I almost went down again- everything started to go black and I couldn't hear- the nurse had to pull the emergency lever.  Now I had 3 nurses and they got me on the toilet somehow.  I remember one squatting down in front of me holding me up and one behind me putting cold rags on my neck and forehead- the third nurse kept sticking those freakin' smelling salts under my nose.   Meanwhile- Sal is locked out, they wouldn't let him in to see me.  I don't know how long this all went on, but by the time they got me back to the bed, Sal was a bit frantic.  THEN I had to get up again to get in my wheelchair to move to my postpartum room- at least this time Sal was there and he caught me when I started to get whoozy while the nurse was coming at me with the smelling salts again (seriously, I now know why they use them- so nasty they can probably bring you back from the dead!)  

Finally get to my room after almost 3 hours!   I had no idea that much time had passed.  I was so delirious with pain and withdrawal, I didn't realize that I didn't get to see my baby (other than the 10 minutes right after birth when she was still in the room)!  Unfortunately for me, the room was filled with visitors.  I know they were just excited to see her, but I was REALLY not up for a room-full.  I hardly got to hold my own kid.  I actually had to kick everyone out to breast feed- no one got the hint.  

I opted for the nursery to keep the baby that night, I was in so much pain and so exhausted, I really needed rest.  I hardly slept in the past 48 hours- between the night at home with terrible back pain and then the night in the hospital in labor I had about 7 hours total.  Well, I didn't sleep much this night either.  I was up every hour and a half to use the bathroom and clean up.  Sal is such a champ; he prepared my "diaper" (as we got to calling it) every time.  I couldn't get comfortable at all, even with my motrin/ darvocet combo.  The next night though the nurse offered me a sleeping pill; she could see I was working on practically no sleep (I guess the black circles under my eyes gave it away!)  That worked wonderfully!  

The next day we found out the baby was jaundice.  We were okay with that, she was going to spend the day in the tanning bed, we were going to go home that night.  Or not.  Her levels kept going up and they decided she had to stay over night.  Okay.  Then the neonatal doctor tells us he wants to check for other infections because her levels are too high.  He explains there could be a problem because I was Group B Strep + and RH-.  Two things that can really harm the baby.  I did receive my antibiotics for the GBS and my shot for the RH-, but he still wanted to check.  At this point we were really worried.  Then I got discharged and they said we could go home (yeah, that wasn't happening) or we could use the hospitality suite.  We said we'd take the suite.  The hospitality suite was disgusting.  Once we got in there, I had a meltdown.  I was worried about my baby, we were in a 10x10 room that was one step up from a jail cell and I no longer had anything for all the pain I was in.  It was awful.  Then, we went back to the nursery to say goodnight to Sophie and I got a little emotional, I couldn't help it, we were supposed to be home doing this.  Well, one of the nursery nurses comes out and starts talking to Sal like I'm not even there about postpartum depression!  "You really need to keep an eye on her.  It's normal for new mothers to be a little emotional, but she really shouldn't be breaking down like this.  You may want to consider calling one of the counselors we have on hand.  It's just jaundice, the baby is fine."  HELLO?!  I'm right here and NOT depressed!  I just wanted my baby.  I didn't get to see her but for an hour all day!  We didn't have results from the tests the doctor was running, we didn't know that it was "just jaundice", it couldn't have been a serious infection!  Sal was furious.  We were both a mess.  And to top it off we were cut off from L&D; the gift shop was closed and the cafeteria was closed.  Thankfully Nicole was on duty that night and she gave us some snacks and stole some Motrin for me :-)  It was nice knowing she was just down the hall if we needed her.

We found out the next morning that there was no infection and it was just jaundice.  Thank God.  But we had to go 12 hours without that answer.  And to top it off they wanted to keep her longer to test again!  So, Sal forced me to get dressed and insisted on leaving the hospital to go get some breakfast.  I practically had an anxiety attack the whole time.  We went to some diner on the Lakewood/Howell border and then to Walgreens to get me Motrin and flip flops (my feet were so swollen I couldn't wear my sneakers).  We got back to the hospital and checked on Sophie- her levels went up again, they were going to do another test at 12.  Those results went up too- but they still released her under the condition we'd bring her back the next day as an outpatient for another test.  We ended up having to bring her back both Saturday and Sunday, but her Sunday results went down a bit and the doctor said it seems she "leveled-off" and should be fine.  He told me to bring her outside for some sun periodically for about 2 minutes at a time, etc.  She had her first pedi appt on Wednesday the 29th and her doctor said she looks great- yay!

So that's my very long story.... now you're all updated!

Tomorrow is my due date

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday and nothing has changed.  My cervix is still closed, but it's low and her head is "right there" (whatever that means!).  I had to have a NST because her movement has decreased significantly, but thankfully everything was okay.  I have to do kick counts through out the day until she's born.  If 3 hours pass without movement, I have to call and go back in.  So far, everything has been alright though.  I had to make another appointment for Monday the 20th, I'm hoping we won't have to go to it though!  If we do, I may have to begin the begging and crying routine.  I really can't go 2 weeks passed my due date.. that would bring me to April 29th!!!!!  Oh I could cry just thinking about that!  I know my body knows what it is doing, blah blah blah, but seriously?!  I've suffered long enough, anyone who knows me knows this has not been an easy pregnancy for me by any means!  I'm just so grateful my Crohn's didn't flare up during it, that is one highlight at least!  But it seems everything else has gone wrong!  It's almost over, it's almost over, it's almost over....

11 days to go...or 25 days..

So, let me update my last couple of appointments- 

At the high risk doctor: had another sonogram, she was still head down, face up (grr!), but growing well!  They said she's 6 lbs 2 oz so far.  So we can expect at least a 7 lb 5 oz baby!  Scary, but my mom delivered me at 8 lbs, so I know it can be done! LOL  That was my last high risk appointment, they released me :-)

At the OB: I had my first internal exam (ouch!)  There isn't any dilation yet, but he said my cervix is low- which is good!  From what I am told and what I have read, your cervix drops before it starts to thin and dilate.  So, we're making a little progress!

At this point I'm just waiting really.  I'm getting a little bored being home everyday, but I'm afraid to go out alone, so I just have to deal.  I've done little projects around the house- finished putting together some of the nursery things (diaper genie, breast pump, etc), cleaned the bathroom (this actually took 2 days because I got tired), straightened the office, made address labels for the announcements, etc.  Nothing too big, but at least I feel productive when I get some things done.

I didn't feel too hot yesterday though, very sick to my stomach and crampy.  I laid down on the couch for a while and then moved to the bed, it took a while but it eased up a bit.  I'm not feeling 100% today, but I am up and about.  We're having some of the gang over tonight for dinner, so I want to make sure the house is presentable!  Speaking of.. I should get up and finish vacuuming.